For my 10th entry in my “12 moments in anime 2009” I’m choosing the philandering ways of Touya from the White Album series.

 

       In the harem themed anime of the past such as Ranma ½ and Tenchi Muyo the guy at the center of the harem had many redeeming qualities that would lead the girls surrounding him to want his DNA. The harem leads from the past weren’t pathic punching bags for all the tsundere chicks in his harem like Keitaro was from Love Hina, and I could no more picture either Tenchi or Ranma getting slapped around by all the women in their lives as I could ever picture myself putting up with any of my former girlfriends/lovers slapping me around to show me that they love me.

 

      So, what the hell happened to the harem genre and their males leads over the intervening years? Well, my personal theory is that in the past, anime in general was targeted and viewed by a larger general audience, and those shows made back their production costs, and then some, by being popular enough to actually make money off of commercial advertising. So, as television audiences and anime audience’s numbers began to slip the production companies had to reley on sales of VHS tapes and later DVD sales to make a profit. 

      This situation led to these types of anime being targeted towards the hardcore buyers of DVDs and away from trying to attract a large diverse audience. So, where we once had male leads of harem type anime where female viewers liked them and male viewers looked up to and aspired to be like them we’re now left with male leads who are avatars for lonely/sexually impotent male viewers who spend more money on anime then getting laid.

 

        Even in a harem anime such as Bakemonogatari where the male lead, Koyomi, is a pretty tough hard core guy and surrounded by attractive females who are available, he’s sexually impotent. Koyomi gropes Mayoi and both enjoys himself and loathes himself for the act but can go no further, he leers at Nadeko who’s attracted to him and available but does nothing, and even when he finally gets Hitagi as a girlfriend he practically had to get dragged kicking and screaming to their first date, she did all the work. Then we have other harem type anime such as Kiss X Sis, Kanokon, and Kiss on my Deity where the male leads practically have pussy shoved in their faces everyday and they’re so pitiful and impotent it’s no wonder why Japan has a negative/zero population growth problem judging by how these males react to women.

Loser #1

Loser #2

Loser #3

 

       So, all this ranting brings be to Touya from White Album, the hero of this post. While Touya may be many negative things such as; a very bad boyfriend to Yuki, a man-whore, a liar, an unreliable person, and a piece of shit, he’s certainly not impotent. When Touya gets that loving feeling he’s not contented with a little panty shot, he wants what’s underneath that thin piece of cotton, and he knows where his sausage belongs. Out of the six main girls in Touya’s harem he’s filled the love canal of three of the six girls (Yayoi, Misaki, and Haruka), and made out with two of the remaining three (Rina and Yuki).

Hit Yayoi many times.

Hit Misaki and left it.

Hit Haruka and left it.

Kissed Rina and wanted to hit it.

Yuki, the girlfriend, kissed her and been trying to hit it the whole series.

       So, in the spirit of the awards season Touya wins the erect penis award for knowing how a man should react to readily available lonely women. Yes, Touya’s shining example should be a guiding light to all males involved in harem situations: Yes, Keitaro you should have slammed every chick before settling on Nauru; Yes, Keita you should bang both Riko and Ako before picking one; Yes, Kouta you should have deflower both Chizuru and Nozomu; Yes, Yuuri you should really taste Mashiro and all the other girls around you; and Yes, Koyomi you should have acted first by picking a girl and doing something; you’re all losers compared to Touya.

All male harem leads please read the following advice.